I was in the shower the other day...

[Raindrop]

Not in literal terms, but spiritual...I have been chewing and swallowing God's word and I am beginning to see why God said that His people perish due to lack of knowledge. I'm planting the seeds by reading and God is doing all the watering so that I may produce fruit. Sure, I've read before...but never chased after God for more. It's kinda like when I make a good meal that stands out above the rest, my kids can't stop talking about how much they enjoyed eating it and can't wait to taste it again. That is me right now...I can't wait to learn more about God and hear what He is trying to tell me. I look and anticipate opportunities to be alone in a corner to read and find myself sitting a few minutes longer in my car to hear more of a certain sermon on CD. I'm even considering taking a few online courses to really devour the word, piece by piece, one freeing bite at a time.

[Raindrop]

You know how I have been trying to wake up early to spend some alone time with God? Well...I was able to rise early last week on my own, at about 5am and turned on the T.V. I began watching a sermon on freedom, which was titled, "LIVING FREE-Breaking the cycle of defeat." I began thinking...I don't struggle with being free anymore, I mean...not really. But when the man started speaking, my heart was moved to listen with great interest and purchase the series of CD's. It is a set of 6 CD's total, which took me 5 days of car rides to work to complete. I needed to hear this message! It is soooo amazing that my Father knows what I PERSONALLY need in my life, at just the right moment! I am FREE! TRULY FREE.

[Raindrop]

I hate that I still feel a bit of joy when someone I know who has lost weight and looks great, gains it all back. Why do I do that? Why do I act as if I need to still compete with others in beauty? Lord, I am willing to change in this area. I want to be able to look at another woman and see all of the great and wonderful features you have given her and pay her a compliment about them. I want to bless and encourage others who are like me, feeling the things I have felt. Not like a crab in a bucket, who pulls the other crab back in with his claw, when he is near escaping.

[Raindrop]

For the past few months, I have felt led to nutritional books...I have felt the eager excitement of a healthier recipe from EatingWell Magazine in my inbox...because I believe that God is showing me that eating well doesn't have to mean dieting. I have a strong desire to eat FRESH food, not over processed, and am beginning to build a better foundation of choices for my kids. Blueberry pancakes with ricotta cheese, frozen banana slices with chocolate syrup, and french toast with peaches on top! See what I mean? Sounds great right?

[Raindrop]

Things my flesh wants right now:

1.A husband
2.Physical intimacy
3.Another cookie
4.More money
5.Excitement of change

Things my spirit wants right now:

1.To get closer to God in my singleness, because I have the rare ability to spend quality time with Him and not have to worry about neglecting my spouse.

2.I want to know what it feels like to be held by God

3.To have everlasting renewal in my mind and walk in authority

4.To increase in faith and be consistent in obedience

5.To be excited about reading God's word

[Raindrop]

I'm one of those gullible gals that's easily talked into things...
Just listening to slow, sappy romantic songs can make me start to feel lonely. Once I start feeling lonely, I'm thinking about who I can call to make me feel "unlonely". Once I start thinking about a specific person in my mind, I begin to replay the good ol' days in my head, which, in turn, starts me thinking about sex. Once I start thinking about sex, I begin thinking about my body, which leads me to thinking about dieting. After contemplating dieting, I begin to think about all the food I can no longer eat, and then I binge. God is showing me that affairs in a marriage don't "just happen". It takes thoughts, which lead to visions, which lead to actions. If, at the early stages of me listening to a song that immediately gets me in a certain mood, I change it and start listening to something that feeds me soul, not my flesh, I am able to take those thoughts captive. Taking thoughts captive in my everyday life, gives me the ability to walk in authority, by dodging the ice berg and choosing not to go down with the ship. Just had to veer to the left and maneuver myself back into the gentle flowing waters of God's will.